Friday, July 17, 2020

This Floating Restaurant Lets You Walk with Hundreds of Fish on a Sunken Bridge!

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Isdaan Floating Resto-fun Park is chock full of wonderfully-made statues of famous figures and animals. In the above image, a gigantic representation of Buddha overlooks a swimming school of Koi.

Way back in February 2020, when the coronavirus was nothing more than a facetious threat and the prospect of the world going into lockdown was impalpable, I had the opportunity to go back to my home country for some much-needed R&R. Only in early March after I returned to London from my three-week holiday did I realize how lucky I was to have been given such a chance. The global lockdown started virtually days after my flight, and so hundreds upon thousands of my fellow Filipinos in the United Kingdom were either unable to go to the Philippines or were stuck in the Philippines unable to clear immigration (whose officers were pre-oriented by the government to detain healthcare workers in hopes of making them volunteer their services in the fight against the virus) or catch any flights. 

Suffice it to say that I consider myself to be extremely blessed-- and even more so because I was able to enjoy some good ol' Pinoy classic dishes again while having oodles of fun with close friends and family in what is probably the Philippines' one and only "floating resto-fun park" chain.

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Welcome to Isdaan (sa Talavera)!

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Massive Gautama heads line one end of the restaurant's massive parking lot.
The Isdaan (literally taken to mean "fish market") chain of restaurants has three branches but the one that I visited with my family and friends is in Talavera, Nueva Ecija, which was an easy two-hour drive from our province of Pangasinan. It was an hour before lunchtime when our convoy of eighteen people arrived at the restaurant and registered at the front desk. Thereafter, guests are required to have their belongings checked by security. I was too preoccupied with what color of complimentary welcome lei I should get that I only heard of two other rules: guests can bring in their own food and drink so long as they pay a corkage fee, and kids below a certain height and age are required to wear life jackets while inside the premises at all times.

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A very colorful statue of Ganesha greets all guests as they enter.

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My little princess and her equally adorable friend actually just ran past the security checkpoint to grab their leis and ogle at the giant statue of Ganesha. 

Upon entering and fully getting a good look inside Isdaan, it's easy to understand the terminology behind its moniker of being a "floating resto-fun park". The place's decor is obviously influenced heavily by water, nature, and ethnic Asian vibes. Giant figures of the Zodiac Animals, Siddharta Gautama, Hindu gods, and dragons dotted the place like a huge open-air sculptors' expo. The dining areas are separated according to the guests' preference-- they can choose to either be seated in a closed dining room or in a hut on stilts above water.  Furthest from the entrance is a space where kids can ride bicycles and go-karts. Situated in the same space, adults can vent their rage by engaging in the Tacsiyapo Wall game. Performers walk around the plaza to do juggling acts or showcase their magic tricks. And as if all of these are not enough, children get free fish food, balloons, and blowing bubbles for absolutely free to keep them even more entertained. Isdaan is cool, unique, and refreshing; it definitely deserves a spot in the Atlas Obscura!

The main highlight and everyone's favorite attraction is Isdaan's Sunken Bridge where guests can kick off their heels and wade into knee-deep water for a walk with the fish! At no extra cost!

THE FLOATING NIPA HUTS
As previously mentioned, guests can opt to either dine in a proper dining room or on a breezy nipa hut on stilts above the water. Of course, we chose the latter. It's located where all the action is (read: live performances and serenading cooks and waiters), but it's a more popular option so sometimes, all the huts would be occupied and some of your neighbors would tend to get boisterous. It's okay if you don't mind the occasional "Happy Birthday" getting sung or listening to the balikbayans next to your hut intentionally declaring in a more-than-average loud voice that they earn a quarter of a million pesos per month.

It was a two-minute walk from the entrance to our hut, and the sun was scorching hot, but nobody seemed to mind and some people in our group even wandered off to make sheep eyes at the sculptures or performers.


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A beautiful view of the nipa huts from a balcony.

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Breezy, bright, and sunny.

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Okay, so I'm pretty sure there are stilts under those bamboo rafts. 

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"Bangkang Bakalitti." I'm not sure what those words mean, but the green-minded me misread them for something --ahem-- quite lewd (in Filipino).

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The archway opening into our hut is manned by a giant oni head and very lazy "security guard".

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Behind the oni head is a quaint little handwashing station!

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Funny story: I thought he was real at first. He looks really real especially when you look at him from afar. So I gave a proper smile and a salute and my jaw hit the floor when I realized my mistake.

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This building is the kitchen, I think. It's directly across our nipa hut.

20200222_144846Buddhist monks line a bridge leading to some more of the huts on the back.

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Across the kitchen is a self-service grilling area for when the guests themselves want to prepare the fish that they either caught from Isdaan's fishpond or won from the Sankilo Bridge Challenge.

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Inside our nipa hut, good for up to 20 people.

THE SERENITY-INSPIRED DINING ROOM
If dining in a nipa hut is not really your thing, the dining room is a good and much quieter space. It's usually a venue for rent for special events, but when there are no bookings, it is open to the public. The building is surrounded by water, greenery, and fertility goddess statues that look like they were arranged to mimic the atmosphere of a rediscovered lost civilization deep inside a rainforest.

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I wish I was back here right now.

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But then again, why would anyone want to dine in the dining hall when they came all the way to Isdaan to enjoy nature along with the food (unless they're very unlucky and ran out of huts or it started to rain on the day of their visit)?

LIVE ENTERTAINMENT
Our rather large group consisted of thirteen adults and five children, and so it was a lot of fun for me to see the kids playfully running around with their (free) character balloons and fish food (the staff informed us that they ran out of complimentary blowing bubbles to give to the kids when we visited). One of the things that nudged up the little ones' excitement a tiny bit more was the performances of live entertainers. There was a magician who performed tricks on a wooden stage. My little darling niece tried to debunk the tricks while acting unimpressed because she says she doesn't believe in magic; flying unicorns, however, are a different thing.

There was also a tall man on stilts that juggled balls. Apparently, he was a lot more fun to watch for the little niece so I tipped him.

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A "magician" performs his magic tricks for the audience.

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I feel like I'm in Carnaval.

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My little one liked him and (quite literally) looked up to him. *haha*

THE COMMODIOUS SCULPTURE GARDEN
Isdaan's main tourist draw is its outlandish collection of statues that seems to not quite relate to each other except to showcase the artist/s' prodigious talent in sculpting figures that range from religious representations (Buddha, Ganesha, etc.)  to iconic pop culture effigies (the Hulk, the NY Charging Bull). But I'm not one to complain; everyone's loving it, so why shouldn't I? 

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Many a selfie has been taken in this exact same spot.

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Do you feel the Zen coursing through your blood from this image?

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I wish they had colored this giant statue of Buddha-- or is that not allowed? *feels ignorant*

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A smaller, less colorful version of Ganesha.

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I teased my little sweetheart that she can find her real, biological mother from this tribe and she playfully gave my bottom a sharp slap.

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I swear that hen looks visibly annoyed.

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Man, the restaurant's main sculptor must really love monkeys.

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Not wanting to give up the "your real mom is a chimp" prank, I asked my niece again to sit on the bench so I can snap a family portrait. She pouted, gave me the evil eye, and stomped off.

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I don't think my little princess ever saw this statue; she ran away when I called for her to come and see it.

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The Chinese mythological god of the North, Genbu.

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One of the twelve Zodiac Animals-- the ox. Don't consult your horoscope, watch Fruits Basket instead.

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Ah, this is my Zodiac-- the snake.


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The sheep, pig, and wait-- how is that a horse?

As was previously mentioned, on the far edge of Isdaan, there are more sculptures and activities for kids like biking and go-karting. The sculptures here are more colorful, interactive, and relatable for kids and teenagers.

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A replica of the Charging Bull in New York.

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My brother said rubbing its balls is supposed to be lucky. Or he might have just wanted to take a blackmail-worthy photo of me.

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"Stop it, tita," my little girl warns me through slanted eyes.

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Dinosaurs!

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I wanted to sit on top of the egg pile for a photo-op, but I was worried if they're hollow inside they might crack some more.

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It's probably hard to see him, but that's my little brother sitting right inside one of the eggs.

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The Incredible Hulk wants more food. On another note, I see two Shauns.

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Hmmm, which anime is he from?

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They look... confused.

BICYCLE AND GO-KARTS, THE "BINGWITAN", AND THE "TACSIYAPO" WALL
While the adults are busy taking photos with the Hulk and the Charging Bull, in the same area, kids can use bicycles and go-karts for their entertainment (for free, I think, since none of the employees came forward to ask us to pay despite seeing that the kids were using them). And when the adults have finally exhausted their camera phones' batteries and memories, a spot of relaxing fishing at the Bingwitan or some time at the Tacsiyapo Wall can help in unleashing their frustration. 

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Isdaan has made famous the Tacsiyapo Wall. It has been televised, photographed, and blogged numerous times that people come to the restaurant just to try it out. The objective of the wall is simple: for troubled guests to feel better by acting as a shock absorber for their rage and (subsequent) violence. 

The mechanics of the wall are equally simple: guests must buy a piece of china (or furniture) from the staff, and from the selection of triggers painted on the wall look for the one that arouses their fury the most. The guest should then take a deep breath, reminisce their most painful, most heartbreaking memories, channel all of their anger into that piece of china/furniture, take aim at the trigger, and smash the object into that part of the wall-- all while screaming "TACSIYAPOOOOOOOO!" at the top of their lungs because, well, it's the other party that deserves the pain and shame (I'm sure it is). 

Or, just smash away without a care in the world like a happy maniac because you enjoy breaking things even for a price. Prices start at Php 30.00 for the small cups and saucers, and dinner plates go for Php 60.00 each. Sometimes, there's even a (used and broken) TV set for Php 300.00-- or so I've heard.

By the way, the word "tacsiyapo" is a Filipino vernacular word and its English translation is "shame on you". That is the only word that guests are allowed to scream-- there will be lots of children around, so please refrain from cursing or swearing (and please aim well).

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I'd gladly smash an old TV for "Kinaibigan pero hindi inibig, tacsiyapo!" but I can't seem to find it in here.

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Oh, they have a section for employees, too.

For a more relaxing way of venting out stress, Isdaan has a section called "Bingwitan" literally taken to mean "where to hook for fish". Guests get to pay for the fish that they catch and have it cooked by the chef or taken home in an icebox.

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This looks refreshing and relaxing, but I'm gung-ho and prefer the Tacsiyapo Wall.

WALKING WITH THE FISH ON A SUNKEN BRIDGE
Visiting a restaurant, you'd think that the main highlight of the visit would be the food. That is unfortunately not so in our case.  When I asked my little lady what she thought was the most memorable part of her visit she bounced up and down on her car seat and excitedly answered: "I swam with the fish, tita! I swam with them!" And before you assume that my cute little princess had gotten her words mixed up,  let me just affirm that she didn't walk in the water with the fish. She didn't wade in the water with the fish. She most definitely SWAM in the water with the fish. You could see the look of amusement on my face while I gave her a bath in the restaurant's outdoor comfort room (scrubbing her hair and body with liquid hand soap, nonetheless) and reminded her that it was a fishpond, not a pool, so she was swimming in fish poop and scales. She really didn't seem to mind, and neither did I. She had the most beautiful smile at the end of the day.

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Earlier in the day, the kids were very reluctant to wade into the Sunken Bridge. Who wouldn't be? Schools of koi as long as a foot were waiting with their mouths open at the base of the stairs for a new batch of guests' dead skin cells to eat while mischievous-looking siokoys (the Filipino version of a merman) lined the bridge. I took the lead and carried my terrified little girl while carefully walking on the slippery, moss-covered bridge. Soon after, everyone else followed suit. Long story short: everyone had fun and the rest was history.

P.S. As I've previously mentioned, fish food is complimentary for children (and Php 10.00 per cup for adults). The kids had a lot of fun sitting on one of the benches in the middle of the bridge and laughing as the fish scrambled over the food.

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Is my brother joining hands with a siokoy?

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Genbu is not only the guardian of the North-- he is also a supervisor to the Sunken Bridge.


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If you're wondering how we fared in the Sunken Bridge, check out my YouTube video embedded below (and maybe subscribe as well?).


For the older, more adventurous diners, Isdaan holds a challenge called the "San Kilo Bridge". The rules are simple: cross the bridge and win yourself one kilogram of fish (hence, the name of the bridge). It may sound easy, but the bridge is actually quite narrow and the water is seven-feet deep on each side. Plus, the sun reflects a hurtful glare into your eyes so it makes balancing a little bit more difficult. Still, a handful has tried in the past and ultimately conquered. 

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You know you want to.

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Just make sure you don't swallow any of that murky water when you (knock on wood) fall off!


AN EXTRA-EXTRA LARGE BOODLE SET FOR CHAMPIONS
At long last, it was finally time to eat. Due to the volume of our orders, we had to wait for at least 45 minutes before it could be ready for us to tuck in. Since there was so much to do around the restaurant, we didn't really mind the long waiting time nor notice that we were all actually starving. Top tip: don't come starving if you're in a large group, or maybe try ordering through the phone in advance. 

I really missed eating Filipino food in a Boodle Fight-style setting. A Boodle Fight is when the food is laid down on a single platform to share. Usually, a table is covered with giant banana tree leaves and is heaped full of rice in the middle with a variety of viands, sides, and fruits on the side. This was why I was really thrilled when my mom announced that she ordered the "Championship Round!" Boodle set (see pictures of the menu below for prices and information)-- until she broke my heart by saying she refused to have it served Boodle-style. I get where she stands, though; my mom is worried about hygiene and the advent of coronavirus and the like. In the end, I decided to just let it be. All the food are all going to end up the same inside my tummy anyway.

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Only for champion eaters!

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My stomach is growling just thinking about taking a sip of that clear beef broth!

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My mom and my brother taking pictures. There shall be no dieting today!

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My mom looking all excited to dig into the sweet chili crab.

The Championship Round Boodle set is comprised of beef broth soup, chicken adobo (the menu said mixed chicken and pork adobo, but I don't know why they served us just chicken), lechong manok tinupig, fried tilapia (again, a deviation from the pla-pla that was promised in the menu), sweet chili crab, fresh lumpia, tacsiyapong gulay (steamed assorted vegetables wrapped in banana leaves), a bowl of pickled vegetables, salted egg and raw mango and tomato ensalata, and freshly-steamed rice. And because we were a group of more than ten people, we were entitled to two free lechong manok tinupig (roasted chicken in banana leaves). I love you, Isdaan!

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The fried tilapia look simple, but they are actually very delicious and crispy to the bone!

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Fresh lumpia and lechong manok tinupig (chicken roasted in banana leaves).

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My goodness, even the salted egg and raw mango and tomato ensalada were very appetizing!

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Coconut milk cooler and iced lemon tea. They covered them up with plastic so as not to attract flies.

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Just looking at this picture makes me wanna drool!

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Top row L-R: lechong manok tinupig, adobong manok at itlog (chicken adobo with egg), inasimang gulay (pickled vegetables). Bottom row: salted egg and raw mango and tomato ensalada.

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My favorite Pinoy dish-- be it chicken or pork.

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Sweet chili crab! Look at the size of those claws!

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An awesome way to spend the entire day!

To be honest about the food, I love how the portion sizes were a good value for our money. Even the presentation of the dishes was very appetizing-- except for the beef broth soup, whose bland appearance was more than made up for by its beefy, salty taste (I wish the chefs at least put some garlic chips or spring onions in it). I am absolutely head-over-heels in love with the super incredibly crispy-licious fried tilapia and the salted egg with raw mangoes and tomatoes that came with a sweet and spicy sauteed fermented shrimp paste; they are both very simple dishes, but they were done very well. Or did I just miss their taste because I've been away from home for so long? Anyway, there was nothing really spectacular about the rest of the dishes and they tasted rather ordinary, but that's not to say that I wasn't happy nor dissatisfied with them.

And as promised, here's Isdaan sa Talavera's menu effective and updated as of April 2020.

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And just like that, our visit to Isdaan came to an end with our tummies and hearts full. I didn't think there would be a restaurant where anyone can stay for more than four hours like we did and not get a tad bored (it was around 11:00 in the morning when we arrived, and we left at around half past three in the afternoon after we finished our meal)! Its eccentricity notwithstanding, Isdaan has recently reestablished its renown thanks to the advent of more specialized social media such as Instagram, Pinterest, TikTok, and the old tried-and-tested Facebook Business Pages. It is slowly gaining more popularity overseas, too.  And as lockdown measures start to ease all over the entire globe, I pray that one day I might have the opportunity to go back home to the Philippines again and do the Isdaan experience all over again. 

BONUS CONTENT!
My visit to Isdaan sa Talavera wasn't actually my first encounter with the chain of floating resto-fun parks. Back in July 2014, my family and I drove straight to the Gerona, Tarlac branch from Clark International Airport after our ten-day stint in Singapore. Our late-night visit (around nine o'clock) coupled with a low-grade iPhone 4 camera meant that the pictures would come out to be crappy-- and I was right! Still, I would love to share them with everyone. The photos do have a nostalgic feel to it, but I wish I had managed to take better ones.

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Isdaan sa Gerona, Tarlac.

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Either my photography skills were extremely bad back then or my camera phone was.

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Those crocodiles look menacingly real.

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The Buddha theme is very consistent in all the Isdaan restaurants. 

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I think this sign is being held up by a huge gorilla. I'm not entirely sure because I didn't think to turn on my camera's flash.

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Buddha looks really peeved at night.

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He's about a few inches taller than me now, but back in 2014 my little brother was literally... little.

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 A more ferocious-looking dinosaur than those cutesy little stegosauruses in Talavera.

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At the far end is a certain familiar-looking wall.

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The Koi game is also strong in Gerona.

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A strange stone statue of Buddha carrying a carp.

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Some angry men fetching water onto a jug.

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This image somehow reminded of the Laughing Men statues in Vancouver-- only, these are monkeys.

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A fish-feeding area.

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We ordered back then a pica-pica platter consisting of deep-fried chicken, crispy spring rolls, lechon kawali (deep-fried pork), shrimps, tilapia, and spicy crab.

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Bulalo (bone-in beef shank soup). The soft, delectably sinful marrow floating on the soup is to die for-- literally. If you have heart problems.

  

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